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All I had left behind me.
I had a brief moment of panic today when I was slinging my messenger bag around and suddenly felt something slip off my left index finger. I knew that feeling. A ring had fallen off my finger, and I hadn't heard it hit the ground! I was out on the street, where did it go, it hadn't slipped into the bike somewhere, was it at the bottom of the bag, had I -
And then I remembered I hadn't put on any jewelry that morning to go out for the day, and what I'd felt slip off my finger was the band-aid I'd put on my fingertip after I cut it slicing carrots last night. It was so close to an old sensation I haven't felt in a long time. Close enough to startle me into remembering old habits and patterns and feel a lot of relief that I hadn't lost anything other than where I was in the world for a moment, which - once it was over - was a genuinely peaceful feeling.
And then I remembered I hadn't put on any jewelry that morning to go out for the day, and what I'd felt slip off my finger was the band-aid I'd put on my fingertip after I cut it slicing carrots last night. It was so close to an old sensation I haven't felt in a long time. Close enough to startle me into remembering old habits and patterns and feel a lot of relief that I hadn't lost anything other than where I was in the world for a moment, which - once it was over - was a genuinely peaceful feeling.